It's about…

I don't know a soul who's not been battered I don't have a friend who feels at ease I don't know a dream that's not been shattered or driven to its knees But it's all right, it's all right We've lived so well so long Still, when I think of the road we're traveling on I wonder what went wrong I can't help it, I wonder what went wrong From "American Tune" by Paul Simon

What is being had?

I have been asking this question a lot lately. Passing that five year mark has been tough on me. I have the interesting situation of both watching the possibility of the statute of limitations running out on attempting for some Polish justice, but at the same time in my heart I do not believe there is any justice in Poland to hope for. I mean how do you sue the entire justice system? How do you convince a judge that a judge is guilty when other judges have apparently refused to even allow my side of the case to be heard.

Dear Adam,

I know you're not blogging for your health, but in reading the blog entries relating to the Polish mess I am struck by your rage. I am more struck by your rage than I am by the injustice of what happened to you, and the injustice of it f-in' sucks. But I am having to fill in for myself the sense of injustice because your rage is in the way.

Not that you have no right to be seriously pissed, but you have to give the rage a context. And you have got to stop being angry at Poles in general. It's not valid, there are some that are very nice and kind people. (Picture yourself listening to or reading an anti-Semitic rant by someone who was done wrong by one or more people who are Jews, and think what your personal reaction to it would be.)

Reorganize your material and rewrite. This may or may not be a book, but if it isn't it's a series of articles or essays. It's already not a new story, which means it's not news unless you have some recent developments. Research who could have an interest in publishing this -- RFE/RL? Others?

A movie could be interesting. Alan Bates in "The Fixer" suddenly appeared in my head.

Frankly, I think the story of what an American is doing living in post-glasnost/perestroika Belarus is more interesting, maybe because I never encountered any other Americans who'd even thought of doing it, let alone who were actually doing it. I don't even know any Americans who've been there more than once, and even they are quite few.

You need an editor, regardless.

So I do this blog. It is interesting and I meet some interesting people because of it. But I am not convinced that I am really any closer to solving the being had problem then I was when I started?

I just took a look at the site - and still say that when I go to www.beinghad.com i shouldnt have to click on anything to get to the main message you are trying to get across - which is your news section (right?). It's still all very confusing when I hit the main page - I think you have too many links between the left and right sections - maybe try to consolidate some of them...

all this stuff: It's about Lies
It's about Corruption
It's about Freedom
It's about Fighting for what is Right
It's about Belarus
It's about Poland
It's about Bikes
It's about the Blogs
It's about Being Had

should be somehow incorporate in the top middle section where it says "trying to get it straight since..." The middle section of your first page is your most important real estate and its not being used (in my opinion) to capture the audience.

I mean, what I am trying to do is to make an injustice public and to have my chance at some satisfaction. I know the issue gets clouded when I add in that I moved to Belarus. I don't really think that this should matter but I know that it does. There are attitudes and misunderstanding to go along with the embargoes and sanctions and all of a sudden, I am more political than I ever intended to be and worse, people have a built in excuse not to listen to me.

You got what you deserve. When you lay with dogs you get up with fleas. When you go to live with cannibals don't be surprised to find yourself in their soup. Such imnmature idiocy to ask for money to prove something to the most anti=Semitic goyim in European history, while Jewish kids in Israel, mutilated by bombings, with their parents killed or wounded don't know how to pay for basic expenses. You are big and healthy enough to earn money for your own legal expenses. Are you single mother with four kids? Why are you shnorring?

I don't think it is really like I have hit a wall, per se. It is just more like, I am torn by the relevancy. I want to move on, I just can't understand what I am doing wrong. Where is the key? What is the answer?

I like the idea of your appeal to establish a fund for legal fees and gather that legal aid for righteous claims as to people subjected to foreign abuse and state oppression which invariably is always 'dressed up' as a criminal prosecution is not yet readily available in Belarus.
Your case, as I am aware, is highly relevant, extraordinary and exceptional as the abuse you have suffered at the behest of officials acting for the state (i.e. Poland) is excessively disproportionate and offensive to the common standards of decency. My advice is that it is worth a try to approach the Authorities in Belarus and petition your concept to them.

So I ask you: what can I do? How do I break this open? I am open to suggestions.

More soon…