Monday, September 10, 2007

I'm rich...

Just got the following letter in the mail. I can't believe the extent of my luck. Apparently, the fallout from the Khodorkovsky scandal has much wider and more sinister reprocussians than was previously thought. Today, an English lawyer named Allen Fox wrote me with a proposition to invest $46,000,000 (Forty-six million dollars!) from Khodorkovsk's slush fund into Belarusian projects. I don't know how political these projects would have to be but the deal is that he would put this money in my bank account and for basically doing nothing but agreeing to give him access to my numbers, I stand to make 9.2 MILLION DOLLARS FOR MYSELF!!!!!

For the life of me, I can't even figure out where they got my name from but for sure the sheer professionalism and intricacy of detail in the letter leads me to believe that this is in fact the real thing. Whoopee! Hurrah! I am so happy that I keep up with the Russian and Belarusian news because otherwise, I might not have recognized what an amazing deal this is. Really, I am… breathless right now. I wonder where I am going to spend it all...

    Dear FriendDear

    My name is Barrister Allen Fox of AKIN Gump Law Frim in London,a
    Advocate of Law and a personal solicitor to Mr. Boris Mikhail
    the arrested Chairman/ CEO of Yukos Oil and Bank Menatep SPB in Russia
    is presently in jail.

    I have the documents of a large amount of funds which he handed
    to me before he was detained and tried in Russia for financing
    parties (the Union of Right Forces, led by Boris Nemtsov and Yabloko, a
    Liberal/ Social Democratic Party led by Gregor Yavlinsky) opposed to
    Government of Mr. Vladmir Putin, the current President of
    leading to the freezing of his finances and assets.

    After searching through the books of your Country's Chambers of
    and Industries, I am contacting you to assist me to Re-profile the
    and equally invest same on his behalf. The total amount of funds to be
    is Forty Six Million United State Dollars (USD$46,000,000.00) and you
    be paid 20% for your "Management Fees".

    This is a legitimate transaction. If you are interested, please write
    back by mail and provide me with your confidential telephone number,
    number and email address and I will provide further details and

    Please keep this very confidential; we can't afford more political
    Finally, please note that this must be concluded within two weeks.
    write back promptly. Write me back through this personal email address
    I look forward to it.

    I will send you the necessary details and relevant documents.

    Yours Sincerely,
    Barr.Allen Fox
More soon...