May 15th, 2002 -2006

May 15th

What does this date mean to me? It is really hard to say. I have thought about what happened to me in Poland so often and from so many different angles that it all becomes a bit of blur really. I mean, I can see that there care some philosophies that say that I should either accept or even be happy about the circumstances. Still there are others that say that I am on a course that could never be altered and that I should accept my fate as it comes to me. Still others say that I should even allow that there was good that comes of all things and none of these even thinks to mention G-d and his will that he has for all of us.

But what this date really has done to me is make me think and rethink my life a thousand times over and to do so from a point of view guilt and ever-present explanation. From the moment that I was slammed into a police cell because of Tomas Zaremba’s lies, I have had to deal with the weight of the Polish bureaucracy, the Polish police, the American embassy, the Belarusian embassy, The Belarusian police and passport agencies, the city of Pinsk, my friends, my family, my neighbors and my loved ones. Since May 15th, 2002 I have not had a single day where I have not seen or heard something that has reminded me of what Poland did to me; be it a theatre reference, a guy on a sport bike or a mountain bike, a new business or even a cop on the street. Every day there is something that is said or done, an opportunity to go somewhere or a need to involve myself with anything outside of Belarus that does not in some way directly reflect back to what was done to me at that time. And then of curse there are the physical realities; the damage to my relationships, the lost face- and even simply that it was a whole year of my life that I will never receive again.

And for what? For what reason have I had to live with this pain for four years? For lies. For a downright dirt-bag of a lying, thieving, corrupt cop; and individual who didn’t even have the common sense not to endanger the life of an 11-year-old girl. Or for that matter to think in terms of her personal ethics when he flat out asked her to lie to the courts. OK, he asked her only to play with the truth, right?

Ok, ok, it was not only him. There was a public prosecutor who also SIMPLY WANTED TO TAKE MONEY. And then there was the lawyers assigned to my case. Or the journalist who had access to all of the papers and knew the truth from the beginning. And the judges, all of whom were simply playing at their positions, not a moment of justice.

And for what? Was it politics? Was all of this because the Polaks simply hate the Belarusians, so they just held me back because this is where I wanted to be? And the Americans also got involved in this because they side with the Polaks and therefore they wanted to stand against my simply being where I wanted to be (and with whom I wanted to be with). Was it the Americans who sent Zaremba to hit me with his car, or did they just decide that this was as convenient a way to keep me here as any. Or did Robert Stolte oif the American embassy simply not care enough to use any critical thinking as far as prosecutor Wiesniakowski’s requests were concerned?

You see I still do not have my answers to any of these questions even four years later. I have as many of the transcripts as were possible to collect, but the last of these have been held by the Polish courts who have refused to release them to anyone. I have no access to any legal recourses inside Poland and no one has been willing to even speak to me about these things.

Four years of this.

So you know, this is the Being Had blog. I made this whole thing to put these folks on the web and to let anybody who cared to spend the time read about them and the papers connected to this case. I have done this for retribution and in an attempt to do some social good. These are bad people. These people are bad for their country and for the world and they disserve to be brought down. This situation must be righted. There must be justice and the lies must be turned to the truth.

Now, I have never claimed to be an expert webmaster. I have certainly learned a few things since I have been doing this, but really, I was never a computer guy except for writing e-mails before any of this happened. But as of the moment I do have some abilities on the web that I didn’t have before so over the next while I am going to try and redefine the situation as a whole. I am not really sure how all of this is going to work out but there is goig to be some new information and perhaps a new rehash of the whole of the case. And for sure, if I can ever get my network connections straightened out, I will try and have something user friendly, if this is still a phrase people use, to help guide you through the information in such a way as to help it all make a bit more sense.

But in the mean time, today is September 15th. And I am so very tired right now. I am tired in my mind and I am tired in my spirit. And I am tired in my heart. And I am sad to tears over all of this.

But before I go and get on with my day, because I do still have many things I need to take care of before I can go to sleep, I want to remember a few people here, who need to be remembered. I don’t know if there is some order that needs to be considered and I suppose I will forget some names but here goes:

First of all, I want to thank Tatyana for being with me through all of this. And while I am at it, I need to thank her mom Irene for allowing me into her home. Also her father Victor who was a friend, may he rest in peace. And of course a thank you for Egor who has come to respect me and probably has learned a bit more than he needed to about life from being near me. These folks I must mention first but also my Father for financial support through all of this and my late mother as well who passed on while all of this was going on.

Thanks also go out to Bill who never being my friend, to Kyle and Lena for friendship and financial support. A very special thanks to Moishe Fhima for all of his help, financial and otherwise over the last six months. And also to R’ David and to Yuri and Yura, Marko and all of the boys and girls of the Beis Aharon school of Pinsk as well as Lieberman and Vova, Boris and Yasha, Misha, Misha, the commander, Reb Chaim, Simon Shapiro, Marat, Efim and all of the others of the Minyon and the ladies group from the Beis Aharon Synagogue. And also to Mike, Stan, Paul, Front Page Magazine, to Tatyana Menakre for not doing a damned thing, Chris Dinant, Robert Mayer, Ecifiro Erihskroy, Sebastian Cornhauser, John, the BR23 blog, Tobias Ljungvall, Dmitry Karpezo, Emiel Elgersma, Rudi Voss, Kira Zalan, Mike Schwirtz, Larry Schenker, John Malcovitch, Lincoln, Robin, Virginia, Sanny, David Zincavage, Klause, Garth, Robert, Charlie, Keli Daily, Andy, Matt, The Sheeple people, Moishe, Merik, Rick, Dave, John and Lisa from Cavalry Couriers in New York for helping out several times.

To Sara, Drazek, Eric, to Bruce Gaskins for all kinds of support I will never be able to pay back, To Mel Pinto exports of Virginia for supplying bike parts for the kids at the bike school. And while I am thinking of them to Sasha, Sasha, Nikolai, Sergei, Sergeio, Max, Victor and all of the riders at school #4 who were so kind to me during my time there. And for the millionth time I am sorry. To Sika Froehlich for the baby clothes, to Uladsimir Valichkin of Viasna for more than I can ever pay back (no matter how hard I try), to Boykowski, Anusia, Lukash from Lodz, to Zhanna and the students of the bank college of Pinsk for welcoming me there to speak so many times, And to Rodger Berman of Peddle Pushers in New York as well as Victor of Victor’s bicycles and Dan Abrams of Sun and Spokes out in Sierra Vista Arizona- and yes Dan, I am still riding that same Red ’95 Schwinn Moab Elite.

To Shmuli Raitman, and Gerard Jones of the Everyone who’s Anyone website for taking an interest. To Vicky and Jean Paul- Yes, I will have your tickets for you, to Valaria for fixing that computer 10 times, to Amy and Alison Bevage, Ania, Alek and Kat, Bartek , Ella, Julia, Kasia, Edward Ivanou and Lena Yurovskaya for helping out for so long with Pod Kablukom, Mariesz, Ewa, Marek, Lukasz, Ania, Milena, Yulia, Vova, Andrerw, Konrad, Jukasz and George from Ostrow, To Rainer Grundies for giving it a shot at helping out, to Vasili Ananyavich of the Pinsk Passport bureau for being interested in the truth, to the old town youth Hostel of Vilnius for putting up with me so often, and to the folks at the embassy there who always have treated me with respect. To the folks at the Pinsk Internet Café and everybody who ever wrote to me with comments or criticism and all of you from all 50 states and 65 countries who according to my stat checker have at least looked at this page long enough to register. And of course to Alexander Lukashenka and the Republic of Belarus for having allowed me to be here for the last few years. Even though I did not receive what I wanted, I would not have traded my time here for the world.

I was quite sad when I started this piece, but now, after going through my mind for as many names as I could remember, I feel much better. I think that all of the good memories I have of these friends has helped a lot.

Anyway, I am not done yet. I’ll see Zaremba in jail one day and I will be paid. And there will be justice. In the meantime, I am happy to be here still and to be speaking about the great country of Belarus.

Let’s see what I can come up with in the next few days. And in the mean time, thank you once again, for reading me.

More soon...